Detox Sucks and I have a survey for you

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Sorry to disappoint my exes and their attorneys or whoever else they have spying on me. I am not talking about drug detox. Feel free to have me tested however you want. Even hair follicles. I swear I won’t go all Britney Spears on you. Seriously, I cried when I cut off 10 inches of hair. There’s no way in hell I could shave it.

I’m talking about detoxing from junk food. On Monday, I started on nothing but raw food, eating nothing but fruits and veggies. No Diet Pepsi, no dark chocolate mint Three Musketeers, no Southern Style Chicken Sandwich and sweet tea. I even switched to soy milk and stevia instead of cow’s milk and sugar.

Ohmigawd, just reading that is making me hungry. This is just so not fun. The first two days I had a pounding headache, probably from the lack of caffeine. Oh wait, now that I think about it, I did cave in and have a Diet Pepsi on Monday or Tuesday. By Wednesday, I was dying. Like Asian-bird-flu-spinal-meningitis-ebola-virus dying. My whole body ached, I was tired, my throat was scratchy and I lost my voice at one point.

If I’d had the energy, I would’ve crawled to Taco Bell/KFC – and stopped at Pizza Hut on the way – just to make it stop.

But I’m glad I didn’t. I feel a lot better now – and I lost 6 lbs – although I’m still sick…feels more like a cold than a flu though so that’s good.

Now while I lay on the couch and watch old episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Hulu, would you mind taking a few minutes to answer a quick survey for me?

Click Here to take survey

Merci, mes amis!

(I probably totally screwed up my French but who cares, right? I highly doubt my 10th grade French teacher is reading this and if she is its not like she’s going to email me to tell me how disappointed she is.

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Tags: babbling

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