Its like PMS on crack

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I was listening to some show on NPR yesterday and the topic was mental health, the DSM (Diagnostic & Statistical Manual) which is THE book that decides what’s an official disorder and what’s not. They only update this thing like every 10 years or so and the next one is scheduled to be published in 2012. Its kind of a hot topic in the psychiatric world world of psychiatry right now because there’s a review draft coming out in 2009. (I had to rewrite that because saying “psychiatric world” made it sound like it was the crazy people that are excited about it and, honestly, I don’t think most of them care that much. I do but then again I’m not exactly your typical crazy person.)

Anyway, on this show they were talking about what is being considered for inclusion in the DSM-V. The topic of homosexuality came up. Did you know that being gay used to be considered a mental disorder? Yep. It was officially listed in the DMS in like the 50’s and 60’s and they finally removed in the 70s.

They were also talking about gender identity as a disorder. Now I’m all for this one! Not because I think people who feel like they were born with the wrong genitalia are mental cases because they’re not. See, if something is listed in the DSM and is officially labeled a mental disorder, then its supposed to be covered by insurance for treatment. (Don’t get me started on health insurance.) So if gender identity disorder is listed then it will be easier for those living with it to obtain sex reassignment surgery.

Ok, that’s not the point of my post. As fascinating as it is, I have never ever felt like I should have a penis. Well, I did in my 20’s but that wasn’t so much wanting my own as it was someone else’s.

No, the reason I’m so interested in this is because there is talk of including PMDD in the DSM. (Sorry for all the acronyms but even if I did know how to spell some of this out, I wouldn’t. I’m lazy like that.) Ok, so PMDD…in the DSM…YES! They should do that! Because I have PMDD and I can tell you it is not normal. Don’t you dare say “Oh its just PMS, suck it up” because PMDD isn’t the same as PMS. Its kinda like PMS…if PMS was going through heroin withdrawal. Living with a woman with PMDD is like living with Jekyll/Hyde’s evil crack-addicted stepsister.

Luckily for me and everyone I come in contact with, I’m medicated. Zoloft does the trick. Zoloft keeps me from wanting to rip the head off of the checkout clerk who put my People magazine next to the ice cream in my grocery bag. Zoloft keeps me from ramming my little Saturn into the SUV that cuts me off on the Interstate then goes 10 mph slower than I was going. Zoloft keeps me out of prison.

So to all of you big shot shrinks out there who have a say in this whole DSM-V thing, please do us all a favor and include PMDD so women can get their insurance to pay for their drugs without having to be slapped with labels like “bipolar” or “depression” just to get treatment. Their husbands and kids and co-workers (and checkout clerks and random drivers) will love you forever.

If you do this, Mr. Dr. People, the world will be a much brighter place. Because you know how that saying goes…if Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.

Thanks!

P.S. Seriously, if you even suspect that your “PMS” is really bad, talk to your doctor. And if you’re like me and don’t have insurance, I can tell you that I pay $30 for a 90 day supply of Zoloft at Wal-Mart. The generic version, sertraline, is on their cheapy list.

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